Maybe you’ve seen how everytime any person raises something gross about lesbian intercourse, we always backlink to
the fingernails article
? This is because online severely lacks the lesbian/bisexual/queer-girl-person sex exact carbon copy of Cosmopolitan’s Sex tales or Sassy’s

Mortifying Times.

You most likely have an embarrassing gender story you want to tell the online world. For prizes! Your own tale tends to be brief or very long (50 to 4,500 words sounds when it comes to correct) and may end up being cringe-worthy or humorous.

The winner will get the Pop your own Top equipment from
Great Oscillations
(a version of this kit was previously
reviewed by NSFW Sunday
), which includes:

+ Hitachi Magic Wand

+ Fuchsia Pop Top Deluxe Silicone connection

+ 2 oz. container of Kindly Fluid Lube

+ And internet reputation!

Publish:

Your own most awkward or many entertaining (or both!) sex tale.

To:

Carolyn
via ASS personal messaging

By:

This Saturday, January 6. Entries can be provided on Autostraddle (anonymously!) next week and visitors should be able to choose for any best/most horrifying.

And, because something life without awkwardly transitioned examples, you will find uncomfortable gender tales from the staff and some ciphered from
the uncomfortable injury-related stories on this blog post
to start out circumstances down:

+ “I am not too yes exactly what it was actually since I have cannot tell my mommy because I couldn’t produce an excuse and I sure as hell wasn’t likely to say ‘hey mommy, can you inspect my arm out?’ ‘What happened?’ ‘[Ex-gf] tied myself up and fucked me personally on the moms and dad’s chair.'”

+ “So single my gf scratched available my clit with her lip band, and it bled and held ripping open for months. Girls, I know we love lip bands, but make sure that your girl’s doesn’t have a-sharp uncovered edge to tear the clit in two. as it will need about two months to completely cure.”

+ “initially I had pre-meditated everyday intercourse, she planned to make use of saran wrap as a safe intercourse shield; I wanted to remain for a lengthy period for public transportation are available because of not planning to simply take a taxi. The evening by itself was one of those ideas that seemed like recommended whenever we were still in a bar, but things had gotten progressively even worse as we got increasingly naked. The uncomfortable part usually a lot later on, a mutual friend linked us from the explanation ‘that lady I experienced terrible gender with.'”

+ “After an intoxicated supper utilizing the girl I became matchmaking and another lesbian friend, we went back to my apartment and everyone began setting up. We typically sat back and viewed as my good friend took place on woman I found myself dating. Then my friend realized exactly what time it was and she must get, but in the turmoil of trying for garments on and of my teeny little bedroom, each of all of them actually tumbled out the door to the hall, just like my super-uptight maybe-homophobic roomie we never ever chatted to was actually producing her method to the toilet. She watched us — in a variety of claims of undress, plainly really drunk, and I also think made a decision to wait. Then your girl I happened to be internet dating yelled ‘I’ll fuck a fucking strap-on!’ on the hallway. The roomie relocated the actual a few weeks.”

+ “final month I finally hooked up with a really amazing (and shy) girl I’d already been chasing for a long time. We’d an intense chat to my chair that changed into that great time of finally kissing -there’d been half a year of buildup. Attempting to be all easy, I interrupted the moment to show the futon-couch into a bed – dangerous action that a little slain the hype. However it had been fine! Therefore held starting up. After which we rolled past an acceptable limit to just one area plus the couch-bed entirely flipped over, transferring all of us onto my cold kitchen area flooring. It actually variety of hurt therefore happened to be both all concerned your different was embarrassed and started asking both whenever we were okay, and that is simply constantly uncomfortable. And, very, my personal roommate (who’s a straight guy) came residence from work (early). He merely stood when you look at the entrance for a while. I happened to be topless. For like 30 seconds we were all frozen with these unusual smiles on the confronts. Eventually he had been like, ‘you guys don’t have to be awkward about that.’ arrived inside, sat down, and started running a joint. It wasn’t as well mortifying in retrospect, actually rather funny.”

+ “I was 18 and didn’t really know yet just how ‘loud’ I found myself between the sheets. So I was having sexual intercourse with my sweetheart and that I believe we thought the woman roommates weren’t home. Therefore we have sexual intercourse, etc., have an orgasm, its over, and then we beginning to hear a slow-clap from area close to hers, slowly developing into two different people clapping and yelling ‘[me] got fucked!’ Her roommates had been totally house and I was completely mortified.”

+ “And whenever you’re making Thai Green Curry for the girlfriend and also you slice right up the spicy hot chillies and after that you wash your hands a lot of times? A LOT OF PERIOD ISN’T ENOUGH. Because later on if you are consuming this lady out and after that you instantly choose a finger she is gonna begin shouting like the woman vag is on flame never IN A GREAT WAY. This will last for two days no level of twat washing could make it go-away whatever sooner. She said it was concerning many unpleasant thing she’s previously considered in her own existence.”

---

Other things took place in the world of gender this week:

+ based on the Female Sexual work Index, which uses a 36-point level of intimate fulfillment that features orgasms, arousal, and pain amounts, women who drink two glasses of wine every day
report having much better gender
as opposed to those whom drink much less:

“women that consumed zero cups of drink scored typically 24.4. One glass a-day drinkers clocked in at 25.9. In addition to two eyeglasses daily staff blew your competition away, amassing a score of 27.3 on average.

Experts were mum on whether or not the drinkers had been really enjoying sex much more or if they were merely currently sort of tipsy, thus prone to broach bawdy topics with others in lab applications.”

+ Good oscillations is tossing a
huge year-end purchase
for countless of its best adult sex toys.

+
The Year in Intercourse 2011
: contains a sizable photograph of Kristen Stewart.

+ The
10 Greatest Workouts to suit your Sex-life
: most likely a lesbian variation might be a lot more wrist-focused.

+

“About 2 years in the past, I was gifted a lovely big, rounded cup dildo. It had been really love at first look and quickly turned into among my personal favorite adult toys.”

—
J
iz
Lee

+ NUDE BABES in
2012 Pirelli Calendar
!

“It is away! The 2012 Pirelli Calendar (Shot by Photographer Mario Sorrenti) is within print. The custom stays exactly the same, the diary is not at discount and if you do not’re a high profile (or a Pirelli Tyre Dealer) seeing these pictures on the net is just like it will get unless somebody leaks some high res images within the next few days!”

+
Future Sex
! It is pertaining to similar, science and stuff, that may change the future.

Disclaimer:


Every one of the pictures on NSFW Sundays tend to be obtained from different tumblrs and don’t are part of us. All are connected and credited for the better of our very own skills assured of attracting more visitors toward tumblrs and photographers who’ve endowed all of us using this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here shouldn’t be translated as an assertion of the product’s sex identity or intimate direction. If there’s an image incorporated right here that is assigned to both you and you need it got rid of, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will surely end up being removed promptly, no questions requested.